Having a rough week...

I been a rough week for me... Yesterday, I had to go to a lawyers office to hear a reading in my grandfathers will, I don't know what's worse that I had to come on my birthday or the family had to go to the reading before my grandfather gets buried. It makes me sick to my stomach even being in this room having to accept the fact that both my parents are gone. People discussing who gets what, shouldn't we talk about this when my grandfather gets buried first not before??? I'm very angry at the caregiver that took care of my grandfather. I truly believe she was a friend of the family. Before she starting to take care of my grandmother she made 9.00 hr and my grandfather was giving her a thousand dollars a week tax free. Still asked my grandfather for gas money, in the beginning I thought my mother and aunt might feel that their being replaced and mayby a little bit jealous. I would call and she would never tell my grandfather that I called, she never answered the phone, and when I asked about my grandfathers condition and called back and said it was important to call me back she never did.. She never told me he was home, if I would of know that I would of came and saw him before I went to Indy. I feel so guilty. I just can't believe he's gone, he was superman to me, nomatter how many times he was in the hospital he always came out of it alright. I believe he lost the will to live, my son and I would come every weekend because I new how sad he was about my grandmother. He would cry all the time. I'm really angry at others because we were very close and I feel cheated. My mom and my uncle we about to get into it I guess the thing is Toyna the blood sucking leach that took care or should I say took advantage of my grandfather's generocity. Moved in with him because her daughter had a bad reaction to hepitatis b shot and is not in a wheel chair and has a tube in her stomach. My uncle is worried about that little girl that is understandable but my grandfather is in his 90's?? If your daughter is in that bad of shape mayby you need to find an actual stable job. My mom and my aunt want her out as soon as possible. The trustees made a document they have 30 days to get out. I have to say goodbye to someone tomorrow I thought the world of. I really hurts like hell losing someone that you loved so much. I wish this was a bad dream and I could wake up and visit my grandfather. I know he lived a good life and he's not in anymore pain and he's with my grandmother now. I miss him so much... He was my father, he would always leave me messages saying this is dad. If your a personal friend of mine. Please sign my grandfathers guest book it would mean the world to me....